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So, a comment came in on the Troll Gallery (warning: contains fat-hate and fat-shame trolling and concern trolling) yesterday, and I have to share. It has no overt fat-hate, so I feel ok posting it, but it has a fair bit of covert nastiness. Mostly, though it’s just an attempt to shut me up and/or shame me. I’ll post it to the Troll Gallery, too, for the Troll Eating Goat’s delectation.

Name: Jayla
Date: July 1, 2012 10:15:14 PM PDT
IP:, (Chicago, IL)
E-mail: jaylaraye09@gmail.com

I like fat people, but you are one hateful person. You are the troll.

Wow. This is just remarkable. I mean it. It has all the unimaginative brevity, banality, and limited vocabulary of the very boring trolls I’ve complained of in the past, but it has all these layers of fucked-up at the same time. My darling Kate actually suggested a new measurement of fucked up just for this: Eye-Rolls Per Sentence (ERPS; the large-scale version being Giga-Eye-Rolls Per Sentence, or GERPS {cue gamers yelling “That not how it’s spelled!}). I’ll go ahead and use that, just for fun.

“I like fat people”

Oh, the fucked-up. This is a variation of the classic “Some of my best friends are gay/fat/women/whatever,” an old attempt to excuse bigotry. That gets one eyeroll. But this has the added bonus of saying that all fat people are the same, that we’re all, I dunno, happy and jolly and likeable by this twit. So that gets a second eyeroll.


That gets an eyeroll all on its own. This is the same “but” as in “I’m not homophobic, but”. It’s a but that says awful, hateful bigoted things are about to be said.

“you are one hateful person.”

Ah. So I am not like all the Good Fatties. I am a Bad Fatty. Eyeroll. Then, too, I am hateful for defending myself from attacks by people who hate fatties. I’m just as bad as fat haters, because I hate fat haters. Classic derailment technique. Eyeroll. It’s also an attempt to shame and silence me, a kind of tone argument. I’m too mean to listen to, and I should stop saying these things, but maybe if I were nicer, if I were a Good Fatty, I’d be worth listening to. The Tone Argument is always a false promise, because no one calling out hatred and bigotry is ever nice enough for the oppressors to listen to, and it’s always a derailment, an attempt to sidetrack the discussion so that the bigots don’t have to listen to you call them out or point out problems. Great big eyeroll. Eyeroll and a half, maybe.

“You are the troll.”

Total lack of understanding of what a troll is. A troll is not someone saying things you don’t like on the internet, a troll is someone who is intentionally trying to cause conflict and strife by saying things they know will get a rise out of people. There are such things as troll blogs, where the entire blog is just an attempt to troll, but this isn’t one. This blog is an actual attempt to discuss the issues and create safe space for fatties. I cannot, therefor, be a troll in my own blog. I could go somewhere else and troll to try to create conflict, but mostly I bring my discussion of fat-hate right back here. So there’s an eyeroll for misuse of the term. Plus, again, an attempt to shut me up and shut me down by accusing me of being just as bad as the fat haters, and indeed worse, because the concern troll she’s talking about wasn’t really a troll at all, she was just worried about my health, because of course I’m in poor health. After all, I’m fat, and therefor I must need to be told to lose weight. So an eyeroll for that.

Tally: 8 eyerolls. (We’ll drop that maybe-half, just to be nice.)
Ratio: A whopping 4 ERPS. That’s just impressive. By contrast, the concern troll our Jayla is complaining about me being mad at clocks in at a mere .85 ERPS (it had an awful lot of filler and repeat). So let’s all give Jayla a rousing raspberry for her seriously fucked up, yet still incredibly dull, efforts. Y’know, it’s people like Jayla who gave John Scalzi the material that inspired the title Your Hate Mail Will Be Graded and the essay it references.

Look, folks. I’m happy to be civil to anyone who is civil to me. But, as the commenting policy says, “I am not too fond of the current definition of civility. See, I think that bigotry is uncivil. I think that rape apology is uncivil. And, of course, I think that fat hate and fat shame are uncivil.” And, while many people will try to deny it, telling fat people that they’re automatically unhealthy, will live shorter lives, and need to lose weight is fat shaming and fat hatred. (And also not true.) It isn’t nice, it isn’t kind, it isn’t civil. Telling fat people that is telling us that we are not good enough, that we are not as good as thin people. And just like telling women we aren’t as good as men, or telling queer people we aren’t as good as straight people, it is bigoted. And bigotry is always uncivil, no matter how you dress it up in pretty words, and no matter how nice you think you’re really being when you utter it, and no matter whether you think you’re right or not. So if you come in here telling me that being fat is bad, and that I shouldn’t be fat, if I don’t just delete it out of hand, I’m going to let you have it with both barrels, because you are being uncivil to me. If you go around saying out there on the internet or in the world that being fat is bad and people shouldn’t be fat, and I come across it, then I may rant about it here, and let you have it with both barrels, because you are being uncivil to all fat people. I don’t rant about every fat-hater who says awful things about fat people because I don’t have the time or energy. But I’m going to do it sometimes, and I’m going to be uncivil because bigotry is uncivil. Period.