Look, no type of body shaming is ever, ever ok. It’s not. It’s bullying, and it’s awful, and it’s generally misogynistic as fuck. You cannot tell whether anyone is healthy or not healthy by the size of their bodies, nobody else’s health is your goddamn business anyway (unless they choose to make it your business), thin people have a right to exist, and I simply do not give a fuck what you find attractive in general (and it’s fucked up and usually misogynist to rate people you don’t know according to that standard). And shaming people with eating disorders will get me breathing fire, as will equating eating disorders with thinness, because that is just fucking disgusting.
But I simply cannot bring myself to fucking care about “thin-shaming”. Seriously. The number of posts I have seen on the topic on FA blogs defies belief, as does the regularity with which I see them. It’s like if I went round to queer blogs, and kept seeing posts about how we mustn’t make fun of the straight people. Yeah, I’m sure it does make them uncomfortable, but no one is making laws to punish them for it, no one is denying them medical care for it, no one is putting together billboard campaigns about how awful it is to be that way and how no one should be, no national political figures are getting up there and denouncing the way they are, no one is denying them jobs or housing for it. People are making catty comments about them. It’s not ok, and I’m not going to let anybody do it here, but do we, as a community, need to keep fucking talking about it? Seriously? Can we not stick it in our damn commenting policies, stomp it when it happens, and then go back to focusing on, y’know, us? There’s a time and a place for talking about the very real effects of body-shaming on thin people, and sometimes that’s even in FA spaces, but the regular repetition of “but what about the thin peoplez?!” is getting on my damn nerves.
I do not want conversations in queer spaces to be centered on the feelings of straight people. I do not want conversations in feminist spaces to be centered on the feelings of men. I do not want conversations in disabled rights spaces to be centered on the feelings of TAB people. And I do not want conversations in FA spaces to be centered on the feelings of thin people.
I do not want to hear again about how OMG some fatties make fun of thin people! They tell them to eat a sandwich! They tell them how unhealthy it is! It’s precisely as bad as saying the same things to fatties!
No. It isn’t. Thin people are upheld as beautiful and sexy. Fat people are told, over and over, that we should aspire to be thin. Fat people are actively discriminated against daily in real life, in ways that do not happen to think people. That doesn’t make it ok to make fun of thin people, but it does mean that it’s an entirely different kettle of fish to do so. Making fun of thin people does not have the weight of the entire goddamn culture behind it. Making fun of thin people is not part of a systematic oppression. That makes it different.
Sizism, like sexism, is bad for everybody. But just as sexism harms women more than men, sizism harms fat people more than thin people. And just as saying shitty things about women reinforces sexism more than saying shitty things about men, saying shitty things about fat people reinforces sizism more than saying shitty things about thin people.
So while I’m going to tell someone who makes comments like “Real women have curves” or “Eat a cheeseburger” here on my blog to take it elsewhere, I’m also not going to wring my hands and say how awful it is, and that it’s just as bad as telling a fatty to put down the cupcake. Because it simply isn’t.
[I think I’m going to start posting this at the end of every one of my rants, since those are apparently the things that get linked to by random spuds: New readers, please read commenting policy. All new commenters go straight to moderation, and I will not let any fat hate, fat hate apologetics, tone arguments, bigotry of any kind, or any attempt to explain anyone’s “intent”. Really vile hate will be posted to a separate page with the troll’s email, IP, and any other information I have available to me. Along with a troll-eating goat.]